a.Road Whore took too many kewl pics
b.Scribes got lazy
c.TWIG relocated her burrow w/o her tech toys
d.Harddrive is wants the trash in html format and the
Scribes got lost in hypertext
e. Trail was so f*cked up the scribes couldn’t truly capture its essence without your help!
Well you made it this far with your pEEps…as for the rest of the trash, pics are at the end, whenever you see a _____ select one.
White House Hash House Harriers Hash Trash Sunday, April 7, 2002
"Sewer Rat Prison Break and AssFinders 30th B-Day Hash"
________
WH4 Hash: #822
Start: Fairfax Government Center
Hares: AssFinder, Looks Like A Kid Drinks Like A Girl, Two Lips In The Bush
Brew Crew: Mr. Softie, Puts it Out
Beer Buns: Just Christie___
The hash gathered on top of a parking garage on a warm lazy afternoon.
Tip Her Whip Her got hash cash opened up and Fourth Skin, seeing that
we were in a garage, got under his hood and started to play with his
wires. Then Put It Out announced the hare’s first mistake of the day, having
the
start of the hash in a garage that SSBB couldn’t fit into. _______
Seeing a Mob starting to look for blunt objects, Assfinder quickly pointed
to the
parking lot below, and all was right. As the hash arrived at the new
‘on-start’, we were greeted by Bend Over Rover playing bumper cars as she
tried to navigate her way into a parking space. In another unexpected
occurrence, Sucks It Blue not only arrived on time, but also had managed
to
scrounge up $4 bucks to pay hash cash, both firsts. (Select the view
that SIB saw for the first time!______) WOWO sporting a Resistol XXXX Straw
_____, asked Bavarian Bush & Sticks Your Finger In It for feedback
on the proposed new look for WH MM. Short Bus Bitch chimed that WOWO
must be confused on what WH stands for? (White House…Western Headgear)
or was he trying to pass himself off as an urban cowboy. Either way
Pork and Cheese voted him an 8 with Road Whore being a 9 when it cums
to wearing a Resistol.
Soon we were called to circle, where guest songmeister Spinal Tap decided
that the newest crop of virgins courtesy of Coin Operated & Roxy
Operated Buddy didn’t need a song since they were all laughs and giggles.
Pussy With a Porpoise color-coded green claimed a virginal assist.
Noticing the smiles on Virgins Just Gary & Just Ron – Betty Crotcher
made a mental note to check out the real reason they came. Microsoft &
Diaper both wanted to know why Just Bobby and Just Christine kept grinnin
at each other. Have Dick Will Travel, MIC- Och Shoots Blanks, &
Leave It In Beaver bet their joy had more to do with battery-operated
toys than their first hash. Just Russell did a pretty good job of entertaining
Just Anne-she was a smilin’ with eyes a twinklin’. as Yanky Cranky,
Jesus Bitch, & Rats Ass joined the songmeister with a second attempt
at singing
the WH4 anthem. (Guys-DO NOT quit your day job!!) Soccer Mom, Hare
Pie, and Shock-a-Cock oral jumped in –n- helped the hash serenade our
visitors with the correct version of our rousing song. ______With the
hares already away, Mellow Foreskin Cheese and Roach Motel turned Father
Abraham into a battle of the ‘rights’______ . We got so confused we
had to consult the sages – RAS and Bundling Board as to which approach
was
correct – was it the limbs facing West or the limbs facing East? BB
stated solemnly the right direction is the one facing beer!! See this is
what
happens when you ask a hasher interruptus (RM) to lead FA with an old
timer (MFC)!
Roach Motel and Mellow got our hearts pumping with Father Abe, and we were on-on.
The pack quickly arrived at a turkey-eagle split, and FRB’s like CumScout
and Shellacking The Bishop quickly took off on the eagle. It was at this
point that Snatch Shot reminded us that we weren’t here to prove our
athleticism, but to quickly and calmly get to the beer. Most of the pack
agreed
and took off on the turkey.
We arrived at the first tunnel of the day and found out how this hash
got its name. It was less of a tunnel, and more of a sewer, and TWIG swore
she
saw a rat. However, it was just And How’s Her Bush lying on the ground,
hoping some of the harriettes had chosen to wear lose clothing. Passing
a
baseball field, Sucks it blue showed off his baseball skills by sliding
into 2nd base. Mitey Tite immediately declared him way out, and ejected
him
from the game for distracting him from running behind No Genitals and
the view that doing so offered.
We were then onto a tit check, where Sloppy Ho took charge and immediately
began looking for trail, while OJ Simpson also took charge and began
looking which left the pack with more questions than can be addressed
here. Down route 50 after French Toasted, and Shock A Cock we went,
where WOWO was seen trying to find a fire hydrant for Mazie and a tree
for himself (Stick was nowhere in sight) It was well worth the time, for
as
they reemerged onto trail, they were greeted with pack yelling back
check 8, which was where they were. We ran through a golf course where
Evil
Jesus made two sand angels in the traps, causing many a golfer to tee
off in the direction, not yelling fore but praying to hit Semen On The
Pew
thru. With another long tunnel we went where one of our visitors, Back
Door Princess, began screaming bloody murder, apparently due to not being
used to Virginia shiggy. The sound did something to Sloppy Ho because
when the pack emerged from the tunnel, she was standing there with her
entire low half soaking wet. With this image in mind we arrived at
the beer check______.
While the pack enjoyed their well-deserved brews, Fuck ‘em Dan-o complemented
Two Lips in the Bush on the amount of shiggy that they had
encountered on trail. Fourth Skin ran around demanding first blood
letting rights and he had the evidence to prove it___. Upon hearing this
Vominatrix immediately demonstrated, with some enthusiasm, where they
could shove their shiggy. While Road Whore tried to convince Just Kelly
to
give into a personal hash flash session, ____ was named this week’s
beer slave and the pack was once again on-on.
The pack was most observant when leaving, because they ran by a check
onto the walkers trail. Organ Grinder & Burning Bush jumped from
walker’s to runner’s trail to police up the remaining 10 runners and
guide them along true trail. We ran through a construction area, and up
a tall
dirt hill where Sucks it Blue found some boards and suggested it was
a perfect place to crucify Evil Jesus. Hey Ho reminded him that he was
the
only FRB left with us, so we had better bring him along to save us
some running. We came to an intersection where no one could find trail.
While the
pack stood around scratching there heads (Head! Who said head!), Jag
Queen laid down in the middle of the road and offered his services to any
harriette that needed a break. Since Organ Grinder, Vibrator, and Burning
Bush were having none of it, he finally thought it wise to get out of the
street before the car moving at 40 mph arrived. Finally, our FRB found
trail, and we were ran through yet another tunnel where we again lost trail.
Fortunately, we picked up the walkers trail, decided we were thirsty,
and hauled ourselves on-in
Runner’s who jumped to the walker’s trail to follow Whore Moans discovered
there is more to walking…like doing the limbo_____ either forward
like Spinal or backward like Beer Slut. Roxy during the beer check
announced the winner of the best buns contest she hosted during the pre-beer
portion of trail, Semen On The Pew, virgins Just Ron & Gary shared
top honors in her book. Whole 9 Yards thought the best buns contest should
have included Asstro Turf, Bolo Head Rat, and Delaware Queen and declared
the contestants need to provide her with a private showing at the next
hash. Mother’s Lay commented he had plenty of WH4 T-shirts so that
‘service’ could be provided (notice to all we are entering the "No Shirt’
‘No
Shoes’ ‘No Service" season. WorldWide stated she would be glad to assist
at the private showing and decided that a talent contest should be added
to the contest. She will rule on hugs technique. Anyone looking to
practice – please hug WorldWide!! Just Stuart interrupted contest chit-chat
with a
declaration of Beer Near and moved smartly to SSBB closely followed
by Just John and Just Vonya. Waiting for the return of the runners, $50
worked the crowd for info regarding the previous night’s party. It
appears that Organ Grinder and Burning Bush ______were voted as having
the
best lei and that Cum Scout finally got lei’d _____!! Mr Softie and
Pimp of Sarajevo immediately demanded a full disclosure of the secret to
getting a
good lei or the beer quality in SSBB would change. Goofy and Hasher
Humper stated they knew a thing or two about a good lei and proceeded to
provide full disclosure so the hash wouldn’t suffer bad beer. What
sacrifices were made!! Indianna Bones, Clorox Kid, Rats Ass, Bugs, Freddy
Does
Teacher and Rear Ejection stared a sit-in protesting delays of the
circle do to gossip-mongering. SO even though the hash would not see the
last
harrier – Bad Dog – until the circle was complete, our own WOWO stepped
forward as lord of the ring and commenced the hallowed Circle!
Circle-antics:
Virgins:
____, _____, _____
Just Gary "Sheer my Fleece" and Just Ron "Muscle Man" came with Coin
Operated, Just Bobby "No Battery Required" and Just Christine
"Just Did It" came with Roxy Operated Buddy, Just Ann "Sugar Momma"
came with Just Russell, and Just John "Generic CyberSex" came
through the help of the internet.
Visitors:
_____
Back Door Princess from the Augusta, Georgia, Lethal from Melbourne, Australia; Rear Ejection from Colorado Springs.
Long Time No Cummers:
Roach Motel bothered to show up from PA. Snatch Shot and Freddie Does Teacher (Bad Dog almost made the list as the trail’s DFL)
Violations:
_____, ______
Loyalty – Hares for picking a location where SSBB could not go. Spinal
Tap for F*cking up the WH4 anthem cuz he started drinking before
everyone else. Hares again for having Cum Scout, Organ Grinder, and
Burning Bush buy the eats they were supposed to get for the day’s trail!
Creating County Tax Increase – Bend Over Rover (thee operator) and OJ
Simpson (the shotgun) for hitting a stationary government vehicle
while parking.
Remembering to Set Clock Forward – Sucks It Blue showed up on time and actually got to see Hash Cash in a timely manner (THWH thanks U)
Not Remembering to Set Clock Forward – Bolo Head Rat, Sextra Credit,
Big Dick No Brains, and No Motion On The Ocean (busted twice since
his socks didn’t even cum close to matching!)
R*cing – No Genitals once again r*ced a 10-miler with sub 9-min miles.
Plus she bragged that the second half was faster then the first. Pimpy
for r*cing the same with sub-8min miles. I think someone was chasing
someone…… Snatch Shot & THWH also r*ced the 10-miler and then
they r*ced on the walker’s trail. $50 for not doing trail because she
r*ced the 10-miler. Well Drilled for doing 3 hashes on Saturday – then
driving to a 100-miler to hash the last 30 miles and then driving back
to DC to do WH4!!
Uppity At-it-dude: Evil Jesus trains for Boston M*r*thon by doing high alti-dude stuff in Nepal vice the Ole U.S. of A.
Fashion Fluffer: Pussy With A Porpoise – green scheme!
Faux Fashion: AndHowsHer Bush, Slip Knot, and TWIG for wearing the same shirt (size XXXXXLLLLLL?)
Now U C Me-Now U Don’t: Hare Pie the phantom hair from the Easter Hash.
Attention Deficit Hashing: OJ Simpson for leading Looks Like a Kid Drinks
Like A Girl through a titty check. How the h*ll are we going to
mature him? Goofy for having 350+ trails and he still can’t remember
one song!
Non-Naked Swimming: Sloppy Ho (you know better - its always one more layer!!)
A Most Solemn Occasion
____, ____
After a coin toss between Just Stuart and Just Karla the Hash decided
that Just Karla needed a name and the hash put all two of its brain cells
to the task of giving her one. Mount and Dew Me was suggested, apparently
for some sort of soda fetish. Also, suggested were Pleasure Chest,
Poke in Smoke, Hot Tub Baby Tonight, and Any Man Will Do. Since she
has always been most insistent about the fact that she is Karla, not Carla,
Kunt with a K, was offered. However, the hash decided that it was her
cheerleading skills should be reflected, so forever in the world of
hashing, she will be known as every harriettes’ favorite cheer, Give
Me A Dick.
Hashit
Big Dick, No Brains was re-nominated because it he was carrying a big
black dildo with him. Cum Scout was nominated due to having run over the
poor, little Easter Bunny with SSBB, and the hares were nominated for
being too lazy to go buy snacks for the hash. In the end, BDNB shall
keep the honor for one more week.
Special Recognition
was accorded to T & Eh ____ the Harriette that kicks rock ass sported her new nose for all to see. Babe it’s a beautiful nose!
Analversaries
69 f*cking, not on time trails for Semen On The Pew and Big Bang. No Genitals finally received her 200 run kewl pewter mug _____.
Birthdays
$50Bitch, MIC-Och Shoots Blanks, AssFinder and THWH (the hasher with a 1000 b-days)
Fare Thee Well
OJ Simpson is going north to Alaska to escape the hot weather that has ascended upon us. C U this fall Bro!
ONONON Gossips!
Where is Summer’s Eve during trail…inquiring minds want to know?
How does Well Drilled maintain that luscious mane thru trail to ONONON …inquiring minds really do want to know!
Looks Like A Kid, Drinks Like a Girl has an ass to be recon’ed with – especially when its ass-on-ice!
Two Lips In The Bush has the most patriotic ass – it went from white to red to blue when he did ice!
Vania did AssHopper and Just Ron before the beer check and Bundling Board and Number 2 after. Bend over boys and ….
Brew Crew Apprentice Put It Out is an early cummer with his pour!
Just Kelly and Just Brian decided they will attempt a record number
of hashes as the Justs! Have issues with namings do you?
What U will be Doing for the next few Sunday afternOOns:
#824 Sunday April 21: $50 Bitch, AndHowsHerBush (NW DC)
#825 Sunday April 28: Ivy Licker (Springfield)
#826 Sunday May 5: Trouser Snake, Golden Showers (Crystal City - RedCross
and/or Mile High Club Hash)
Summer Camping Trip is around the corner tentatively scheduled for July 19-21. Your mission fellow hashers is too:
(1) Take Monday, July 22 off from work.
(2) Put on your thinking caps and see if you can cum up with the winning theme for this year’s camping trip.
(3) Before you lose your theme idea, find a member of mis-management,
tell them your theme idea and then quickly flash ‘em so they won’t
forget that to see more of U remember to vote for your theme!
Previous themes were Band Camp and Bible Camp!!
WH4, Edition 040702, Hash Trash "All the Shit that Fits" (202) PUD-JAM0 and (202) 232-HASH WWW.DCHASHING.ORG/WH4
Repeat to yourself: I will see Mother’s Lay for the first edition photo
CD ($3) and to purchase a Beer Madness Hash T so I won’t have to look at
Hey Ho as a fashion model any
more!!