Warning: THREE MORE WEEKS!!! THREE MORE WEEKS!!!

Wh4 hash #748

Hares: Jag Queen and Virgin With Mary

Location: Merrifield, VA

It's my birthday and I'll hash if I want to, even if it's -40F in the sun. Despite the brutal Arctic wind, over 60 hashers paid WhereDaFa-Khawe the customary $4 for the privilege freezing their butts off. Black Box, of course, was there early. Even Hawaiian Puke, who returned on the redeye that morning after a two-week vacation in Hawaii, was present sporting multiple layers of new Hawaiian shirts. Perk-A-Set and yours truly, the birthday girl, led a quick Father Abe before setting following trail to the beer. And no less than four were in shorts - Wax On Whacks Off and his landlord, Put It Out, The Pimp of Sarajevo, and And How's Her Bush didn't have to worry about the agony of skin rending briars, their legs were too numb.

Jag Queen and Virgin A/Mary promised us a beer and shooter stops, and they delivered. Oddly, the temp at the beer stop was a balmy 30F and no one wanted to leave.

There was minor confusion at the end, but the bags and SSBB, piloted by brew crew Barney's Bitch and Never Saw Him Cumming, caught up with other. The hares were briefly toasted before we gave up and found a warm bar.

If the hares and mismanagement (and a few others) were drinks:

1/2 oz raspberry vodka

1/2 oz triple sec

Splash of lime juice

Splash of pineapple juice

Splash of cranberry juice

Top off with brut champagne

Mix, drink. Goes best with cheese poofies and fudgie cookies.

12 oz. whiskey

12 oz. beer

12 oz frozen lemonade concentrate

1 cup crushed ice

Add ingredients and mix in blender. Wipe up the mess, wring the mop into a glass, and enjoy.

1 1/2 Oz. Dry Sherry

3/4 Oz. Dry Vermouth

1 Dash Orange Bitters

1 Cherry

Stir all ingredients (except cherry) with ice and strain into an unbreakable vessel. Top with the cherry and chug. Repeat as necessary until you get the accent just right.

1 Tbs. Sweet Vermouth

1 Oz. Gin

1 Tbs. Orange Juice

1 Tsp. Triple Sec

Shake all ingredients with ice, strain into a WH4 mug, and chug. Or simply pour into your hollow leg.

1 part Early Times

1 part Mountain Dew

1 1/2 parts Orange Juice

Make sure all ingredients are chilled. Add in order: ET, OJ, Dew. Stir lightly. Like most OJ drinks, the alcohol is hard to taste. A padded bar is recommended.

1/2 Oz. Triple Sec

3 bellybuttons of Gin

1 Tbs. Orange Juice

Shake all ingredients with ice, strain into a cocktail glass, and serve. That'll cost you $4.

2 Oz. Gin

1/2 Oz. Dry Vermouth

1/2 Oz. White Creme de Menthe

1 Tsp. Pernod, whatever the heck that is.

In a mixing glass half-filled with ice cubes, combine all of the ingredients. Stir well. Strain into an unmarked bottle and sip innocently.

1 oz. Blackened Voodoo Beer

2 oz. Southern Comfort

1/4 oz. Bacardi 151

1/4 oz. Everclear

1/2 oz. Captain Morgan

4 oz. Club soda

1 oz. Mountain Dew

24 oz. Schlitz

Throw all in a glass, light it. When flame goes down and fire department has left, chug but make sure you have a chaser.

1 1/2 Oz. Light Rum

1 Oz. Orange Juice

1 Tbs. Lime Juice

1 Tsp. Sugar

First, you have to put on all your White House H3 stuff, including the fuzzy shoes. Then blend all ingredients with 1/2 cup shaved ice in an electric blender at a low speed. Pour into a champagne flute and serve.

Guinness

'nuf said.

3 shots Peach tree schnapps

3 shots mountain dew

Pour all ingredients in rocks glass. Stir the f*cker. Watch it fizz for thirty seconds. Drink it fast.

1 Oz. Melon Liqueur

1 Oz. Tequila

4 Oz. Grapefruit Juice

1 Slice Lime

Pour melon liqueur, tequila, and grapefruit juice over ice in a highball glass and stir. Add the slice of lime, stick pinky out, and sip daintily.

1 fifth Gill Port

1 fifth Gill Bailey's Irish Cream

Measure the port into a brandy glass, the pour the Bailey's in. As the Bailey's enters the port it will solidify, forming a glob. Show this to everyone. Drink if you dare.

1 1/2 Oz. Dry Sherry

3/4 Oz. Gin

Stir ingredients with ice, pour into spill-proof cup, and serve.

1 Oz. Amaretto

1 Oz. Creme de Cacao

5 Oz. French Vanilla Ice Cream

1/4 Oz. Chocolate Syrup

2 Dashes Vanilla Extract

Combine all ingredients in an electric blender and blend at a low speed for a short length of time. Don a red dress, pour into a chilled champagne flute, and drink.

1 Oz. Light Rum

2 Oz. Pineapple Juice

1 Oz. Blue Curacao

1 Oz. Cream Of Coconut

1 Slice Pineapple

1 Cherry

Blend light rum, blue curacao, pineapple juice, and cream of coconut with one cup ice in an electric blender at high speed. Pour contents into a highball glass. Decorate with the slice of pineapple and a cherry. Put on your best cockatoo shirt and contrasting shorts, and enjoy.

2 cans frozen pink lemonade

10 bottles beer

26 oz. gin/vodka

Combine all ingredients in a bucket. Serve with straw(s).