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WH4 Needs Volunteers for

Y2K mismanagement!!!

Speak with Big Bird Turd

or Wheredafukhawe Today!!

White House Hash House Harriers MisManagement

(Those Responsible for all the Debachery!)

This is the perfect way to show your hash support. People are needed to step forward for Y2K Mis-management. If you are interested in being a member of Year 2000 Mismanagement see a member of this year's Mis- management. Position listed BELOW.

The new mis-

management will take over at the annual White House Holiday Party January 22, 2000.

1999 MISMANAGEMENT

In addition to all the fun stuff, there is a lot of hard work and effort that goes into running the hash. These folks put a lot of their personal time into this "volunteer" work and make a concerted effort to be there each week.

· Joint Masters- BigBirdTurd, Wheredafukhawe

· SongMeister - DrinksonMeBud

· HashHops (Brew Crew) –CervixWithaSmile, JailHouseCock, DropBox, RoadKill, Steamer’sBitch, Number2, and Vominatrix

· HashFlash –PullsItOut

· Religious Advisor -GreatBallsOfFire HashCashs – LeaveItInBeaver and ButtPlug

· HareRaiser - FussyBitch HashScribes – BiteMeElmo, DangerouslyClose, MellowForeSkinCheese.

· HaberDasher-HaserHumper

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ANNOUNCEMENTS

· White House Hash House Harriers Annual Christmas Party is January 22, 1999 at the Eagle’s Nest Club in Alexandria. Live band, dancing, food, beer, and stuff. 200 person limit. Registration is $35 until until January 1, 2000. After the first registration goes up to $50. Make your checks out to:WH4 and hand them directly (or mail them) to LeaveItInBeaver or ButtPlug (or give it to any mismanager!)

· We will be collecting Toys for Tots for the holidays. Bring your contribution of a new toy (unwrapped) to the hash. FussyBitch and OilofNoLay will be collecting toys until December 19, 1999. Also see special insert regarding this

· There is a FullMoon Run on Friday, December 17, 1999, but your errant scribe has misplaced the info on this. Check out the dchashing.org website and/or talk to BlackBox or DangeroulsyClose for the details!

· Due to some minor problems with a recent order for sweatclothes, another order will be placed. Several people have asked if it is too late to get sweat clothes. Due to the reorder, you still can. HashserHumper must have your order form NO LATER THAN Sunday, December 19. She will be at the hash (at the Ellipse) on 12/19/99. Call her at work, 202-994-7310, if you want her to fax an order form to you (two pages) or email her at richsuzy@patriot.net, and she will send you a form as a WORD attachment. If you won't be at the hash on Sunday, 12/19, snail mail the form and a check payable to Suzanne Stephenson to 4101 David Lane, Alexandria, VA 22311.

If you previously ordered sweatclothes, she will have them on the 19th. This excludes any who were contacted about a problem, which will be taken care of. Due to parking, or lack thereof, on the ellipse, you may have to go for

a walk to get them though!

Remember the final deadline is Sunday, 12/19.

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December 5, 1999 Run:

The “George is Dead” hash – Hares: Oralgina, The HasherFormerlyKnownAs…CremeInTheMiddle, DepositInTheRear and her friend whose name never made it onto the official scribe notepad but if memory serves correct it was “Sue”….I think…

Not to be confused with “Paul is Dead” (If you have to ask, you are much too young for your own good) this was the “George is Dead” hash. As in Washington. As in the Father of Our Country, or “dad”. In honor, or reverence, or perhaps sadness, we celebrated the anniversary of George’s death, by desecrating his home.

The hash began at Mt. Vernon – heck, a Mt. Vernon hash doesn’t even begin at Mt. Vernon. We circled up in front of Mt. Vernon for an, uh, interesting rendition of Father Abe. We sang, “George is a Ho” – which was darn nice of us. TeenieWeeniePeenie insisted that George was quite the womanizer. Its true he and Martha never had children, but I’m guessin’ George was shootin’ blanks.

At any rate, trail went straight onto George Washington’s beloved estate. The goats trembled in fear as FullMetalBalls, and the rest of the pack, passed by. We did a loop through the grounds, past George’s tomb, through the garden, where the packs’ fans (as in the walkers) cheered the pack on. Meanwhile, many of the tourists glanced about nervously, wondering why someone dressed liked Boy George was running through a historical area. Hare, Oralgina, actually called Mt. Vernon and GOT PERMISSION (can you believe it???) for us to run through the estate. What is up with that?

We left the estate, hung a right and headed down the Mt. Vernon trail. FireCrotch was ambling along, SlickSlit, Zimboobwe, JustTanya, JustCarl and JustMonica hung a right into the trees and the scribe foolishly followed this mostly merry band of virgins. Over the roots and streams, and through the leaves we went…and it was wrong…we went left, came out of the woods, crossed the Mt. Vernon Trail, then crossed over the George Washington Parkway (which was rather exciting in itself), and back into the woods. Where MarthaWashington (aka DepositInTheRear) was beckoning to us to follow.

StoolSample dashed across the road and disappeared into the woods to never be seen again. NoGenitals however took control of this haggard looking band of hashers and BarkADildo and the aforementioned folks from the previous paragraph, slipped, slide and, like JustBen, twisted ort ankles over the leaves and roots. It was rough going.

We continued on until Mrs. Washington bade us to not go over private property (the scribe was informed later by TheHasherFormelyKnownAs….a co-hare that had we kept going at that point trail would have BT’d at a dead dear skeleton. Excellent!! But, sadly we missed that). Eventually, trail came out of the woods and into a lovely neighborhood, where BarkADildo, speaking in hushed tones, informed the scribe (would this make him an “informer”) that the beer stop was at a high school. We rounded a corner and lo and behold. There was a high school, and the beer stop, technically was in a neighborhood that apparently was having a contest as to which house could hang the most wreaths.

The Beer stop was entertaining as usual. LazyMotherFu**er tied a cherry stem into a knot using nothing but his tongue; DickIsFine stood about trying to pretend he did not know us; and BeastieBush said, and this is a direct quote, “Blah blah blah blah”. That was the most profound thing this scribe heard all day.

Unable to continue running, the scribe joined the walkers. Which in it self was interesting. LeaveItInBeaver has made a stunning recovery from his surgery and was spryly walking along without the use of his cane. SpitsItOut and TransparentD’s sang the “Driedl” song for us. And ForSaleOrRent was seen running on the walker’s trail (silly girl). FussyBitch and GreatBallsofFire were deep in conversation, probably discussing Chechenya, the merits of the Republican presidential contenders, and the issue of gun control and legalizing drugs. Those two philosophers!

At any rate, we wandered along Mt. Vernon Parkway, until we returned to, by golly Mt. Vernon, where we drank and ate and had a circle!

The Circle:

TheHares – DepositIntheRear, Oralgina, ThehasherFormerlyKnownAs, CremeInTheMiddle, and Sue (?) all drank.

Virgins:

JustDave – Tartwheel’s Brother (boy, wait till he tells their Mom and Dad about what she does on Sunday’s!!)

JustSue – DepositInTheRear

JustMelanie – JustTanya

JustShane – ToxicShockSyndrome

BigBirdTurd and GBOF gave away the first round of mugs as part of the new “WhiteHouseHashHouseHarriers” mug club. Anyone who has 25 runs with WH4 will now receive a lovely White House mug and lanyard, so they can always have a beer drinking vessel with them and we can eliminate waste and save money by not buying so many stinking plastic cups!!! Folks with 100-200 runs got theirs first (the mug and lanyard is retroactive).

LongTimeNoSeers:

TidyBowl

BallBuster

SlickSlit

Special Presentation:

TeenieWeeniePeenie came into the circle and called Perk-A-Set, the hasher who named him into the circle. She reluctantly came out. He wanted to prove to her that his hash name is NOT true. TWP asked her to reach down his pants; PAS did, but there was fear on her face. Out she pulled the longest, um, er, well, dildo, ever seen. After they both drank, WaterGate entered the circle to give TeenieWeeniePeenie a pack of the tiniest condoms you ever done seen.

Naming:

JustJen was put through the paces. Her naming suggestions revolved around the fact she has pierce tongue and that she had once attended Harvard (yikes! She is not as dumb as a hasher ought to be!!). At any rate the name IvyLicker was hoisted upon her.

Engagement:

A scary phenomenon is happening. Interhash dating. LazyMotherFu**er and FireCrotch are engaged!

WaterGate drank for being Ms. January in the Gypsy in the PalacesH3’s calendar.

Anal-versarries:

Oralgine – 150

DepositInTheRear – 25

OilofNoLay – 25

BallBuster – 25

ButtKissing:

As tradition dictates the loser of the Army (HadaMadame)-Navy(GBOF) Game has to kiss the other person’s butt. Since Army lost (9) to Navy (19) this year, the former West Pointer did more than kiss the former Naval Academy grad’s butt, he bit it!

Violations:

Breathless - For wearing leg weights while running

Birthdays:

BoloheadRat, HawaiianPuke, DrinksOnMeBud, BlondRoots

Hashshit:

GBOF won it for, in the words of BigBirdTurd, an “arrogant SOB”.

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This week's Hash Trash compiled and formatted by

Bite Me Elmo. Volunteer for Hash Scribe now!! You too can write senseless drivel each week !!