IN BEER WE TRUST
WHITE HOUSE HASH HOUSE HARRIERS

Run #593
The Sail Through The Washington Harbor Hash

Location: The boat dock at Riverside Grille, Washington Harbor, in Georgetown

HOT INFORMATION

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WAGNER BROTHERS BBT & MFC AND ALSO US BOOBS & WORLD REPORT - YOUR HARES

Get your hash information electronically - Contact GBOF via email at smythe_andrew@birdengineering.com to be added to the WH4 electron list (Submit First & Last Name, Your Hash Name [if you have one], and put "GBOF" in the subject line, make sure you send your email address).

LAST WEEKS HASH

View from the Pack

Well gang, I was LATE again. I missed the circle, and caught you somewhere just prior to the beer check. That means an abbreviated trash. GOOD, because this is LOTSSSSSSS of work.

I think the circle started with Spinal Tap call you all together then baiting some FOOL into the circle to lead you all in Father Abraham (if I were King for a day I would have called forward The Chicletts and The Brady Bunch to do it!!!!!!). The hares then came forward and gave us the age old instructions "circles are checks and X's are BT's. Then after some BS and other stuff I guess you were off in one big humongus gaggle.

As you ran along the Potomac, Bad Dog s**t on the bank, Fussy Bitch did it in the bushes, and Noah's Arc floated up a body of water (who's body was it you may ask, I don't know. I wasn't there, ask her!!!). It was my fortunate opportunity, as I came up to the start late, to see you all strung out wandering along the river; it looked good. You were really amazing the tourists, they were even pointing at you as though they were in the zoo watching the animals perform. Maybe we are wild beasts after all???

As I ran by Sequoya's restaurant I came upon Had A Madam, he was also late and he asked me where the start was. He apparently had his car illegally parked and was trying to sort things out (Al this is a first for you, thinking something through). I informed him "somewhere over there" and then continued down the river.

I then came upon a check at the river and the Kennedy Center. Because NO ONE in White House seems to mark the checks so I had to fumble around for some time until I finally figured out that the trail went back up by the Kennedy Center and then on across and in to the District. As Ipassed in front of the Kennedy Center and crossed the street to it's left I stumbled on Agua Nino and Bark A Dil Do who were wandering along in a group of WALKERS. Thank goodness I found them, I had been SAVED. I continued along and MISSED a check up a back alley, but as I looked back two blocks I saw Cheese Spread turning up the alley. I said to myself, "get back on trail stupid", just then I turned around and ran the block and a half to the check. It took me several minutes to catch up with the walkers again.

After the alley we came out into a parking lot which lead to a baseball field, which finally turned onto a trail that lead into the bear check site. Boy were there lots of hashers there. This was my first understanding of the magnitude of our weekly showup for the hash (well over 100 strong). Bad Dog, Bark A Dil Do, Bavarian Bush, Blazing Stradle, Bonnie Brewer, Bramble Bush, Celtic Climax, Champagne Charlie, Chappaquickdick, Chees Spread, Dirty & Hairy, Drinks On Me Bud, Dumb & Dumber, Dumb Blonde, Eat It Raw, For Sale Or Rent, Goofy, Had A Madam, Hawaiian Puke, Hasher Humper, Heat Seaking Moisture Missle, Hurls From The Crypt, Ich Liebe Dick, Jimmi Hendrix, Late Cummer, Latin Analyst, Love Me Tender, Mellow Foreskin Cheese, Menage A Trois, Missed Erections, No Butts No Glory, Number 2, Perc A Set, Pro Boner, Put It Out, Put The Bitch Down, Raise My Titanic, Road Kill, Rude Boy, Spinal Tap, Stool Sample, Trouser Snake, Wilburrrr, and Yeast Injection to name a few. The beer stop was a MAJOR social event with lots of movers arounders (people who stop by and say hi then move on to the next group and say hi, etc). In addition, the brew crew was REALLY working the taps to keep us all happy. After several fluid moments the group began to get itchy and we were off.

We crossed a road, ran over piles of lumber (at least I did, lots of other people ran around it) and into another park area. We then wandered down through Rock Creek park. I especially enjoyed the shady trails and the calm creek crossings. It was to bad we had to run through sooooo much PI, but alas this is a hash.

As we crossed Poplar Street, on the high ground overlooking Georgetown, I knew that we were almost home (or so I thought). After this we ran up and down several streets, 30th, Lumberton, 29th, Congress; this section finally culminated as we broke out near Whithurst Freeway. After crossing under it we snaked our way through a construction site and squeezed through and around a chain linked fence (boy was that tight for some of the gang.

We then wandered down and down and down a LOT OF STEPS and finally reached this opening at the River. Boy did it STINK. We were finally IN. Many of the wankers immediately left to get their cars, being that were BLOCKS and BLOCKS away from the start.

View from the Rear

The Black Lady Of The Box did not show this week, we have no words from her this week. Why dear lady did you not want to venture into the district to run; could it be the parking, or the company or the noise or was it just that you were to LAZY. Only you know for sure GIRL, will you talk and let us know?????? Because we love you soooooooo much I am including a quote from last weeks trash to remind us of you eloquent words and feelings. " What a great end to a great day! I woke up on Monday morning and decided it was much tooooo nice to go to work. I had also been worried about what time I would need to leave the office in order to get home, feed my dog, and still fight the Beltway traffic in order to get to Springfield by 6:30 for the start of the hash. So I called my office and told them I would see them on Tuesday. Hey, I know my priorities!"

On On. Black Box

So girl what are your priorities for last week???

View from the Circle

After we arrived and began to smell the sewage on the river, the only good sites were our good old Shitty Shitty Bang Bang and our one and only Hasher Humper selling her goodies. I knew the circle was soon to happen. We then began the weekly festival called "chilling out". After some minutes of beer drinking, Spinal Tap called the group to circle. He then called the hares forward; Love Me Tender, & No Butts No Glory came forward to BE RECOGNIZED. All present were then asked to answer that old question of "What did you think of that run?". And as all hashers have come to understand the age old response of "What a Shitty run!" sprang forth from the group. After some solemn deliberation Spinal Tap & Our Temporary Religious Advisor with The Stick asked for a song (which was "Why Were They") and the hares drank, and the sight was good. Spinal Tap then called the Virgins forward, AND THER WERE LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS OF THEM!!!!! Their vitals are listed below:

The song meister (Pussy Whipped's buddy with the BIG stick) than led the group in "Why were they born so beautiful", and then they drank for the their Virgin Honor, it was a good sight and they did well. Welcome Virgins, come often. We had 4 VISITORS (just) Paul from London, Squat from Australia, Beats Me from Atlanta, and Toungless from Gypsies In Prague. They drank to "The Roof" and boy were they on fire. Enjoy your souvenir mugs (we are now issuing our brand new cheaper ones).

We had several birthday's this week, they included; (1) Hooter Tooter, (2) Tidy Bowl, (3) 3X A Lady and one of the Chickletts (when one chicklett etc). Our BIG GUY with the stick lead us in the birthday song "Happy Birthday uck You" and they drank and they drank and some of them threw it over their shoulders. Our returnee's included: Had A Madam, Shooting Blanks, Barp Spots, Deep Goat, Almond Joy, Hurls From The Crypt, Cross Dresser Ghoast F*ck, The Chickletts, The Brady Bunch. We were lead in the song "The Roof Is On Fire" as they drank.

Awarding Of The Hashit - Well Trouser Snake finally got to give it up (it almost seems as though he lost his VIRGINITY) - last week he was a NO SHOW and that caused him to almost win it AGAIN. But alas that was not to be. We had a lively contest this week, and guess what the Hashit was actually there this week, WOW!!!! The nominees included: (1) Trouser Snake for Hashing in a Race For The Cure T-shirt; (2) Big Bird Turd (yours truly for shredding 12 trashes in the process of repro-ing last weeks publication; (3) Had A Madam for losing his keys on trail at Great Falls and then finding them in his pocket some time late; (4) Hares for generally messing up on the hash,; and finally (5) Drinks On Me Bud for coming such a LONG distance to make the circle. AND the winner is Had A Madam the lost in keyland guy. The guy with the BIG stick then lead us in "He's The Meanest" and Had A drank well.

View from the ON ON ON - The ON-ON-ON was held at the Riverside Grill On The Potomac Basin in Georgetown. We had no special deal, only pay per beer and pizza by the pie. Everyone enjoyed the deal and it was good. The view was great and all the wankers blended in well with the locals and tourists who were also gathering to enjoy a beautiful Monday night. Drinks On Me Bud was observed falling asleep several times on his bar stool; we will excuse him because of his dedication to hashing (hash in the morning in Denmark, then fly to DC and make our hash event!!! WOW). After a couple of hours of GREAT companionship, the crowd thinned and the hash was history for another week!!! Can't wait to next week!!!!

In my CONSTANT REMINDER section I would like to thank Mayor Marion Barry for such a wonderful city for us to run and celebrate in this past Monday. You are good people Mayor, have a GREAT retirement and hope to never see you again. Also thanks to the Brady Bunch and the Chicklets for Coming and Coming and Coming in the summer months. We love you all. Keep it UP!!!!

Is there anyone else who wants to insure that I include them in the trash EACH WEEK, if so let me know and you will get in my CONSTANT REMINDER section.

On, On, Big Bird Turd

RECEEDING HARELINE

#596 June 22; 6:30 PM Put It Out & Late Cummer & (maybe) Big Bird Turd
START: Van Dorn Metro 6:30PM (Directions: Beltway to the Van Dorn St. At the end of the exit ramp turn left at the stoplite. This goes down a steep hill towards Alexandria. Turn right at metro sign). OTHER DETAILS: Note that Metro charges a couple bucks for parking on exit before 10PM. Cheapskates avoid this by 1) staying at the close by on on on until after 10 B) parking someplace nearby and walking in. Forward thinking eco-sensitive types avoid this by taking the metro. A to A'. Not a trail for sissies: hip waders, shovels, protective eyewear, snake bite kits, brush axes, searchlights, GPS navigation equipment, overnight gear and dry socks all might wind up being helpful. Known hazards include road rage, trail rage, posion ivy, poison serpents, poison pens, hostile natives, falling space junk and possibly one small pricker. (Tough dog friendly--leave cinderalla slippers at home.) ON-ON-ON: the fabulously famous Nicks at 642 South Pickett. ("Wear your nose ring"--Nicks goes Gothic at 10PM on Monday nites, ALSO it is an easy walk from start).

#597 June 29; 6:30 PM Yeast Injection & Trouser Snake Start Foggy Bottom - GWU
#598 July 6; 6:30 PM Rude Boy & Mystery Hare
#599 July 13; 6:30 PM Bastille Day Hash Shooting Blanks & Mystery Hare Start: Tenley Circle, NW DC
#601 July 20; 6:30 Bundling Board, Cums On A Wimp, & ?
#600 July 25; 3:00 Satined Sheets, Perk-A-Set, & Big Bird Turd Start: McLean VA VFW
#602 July 27; 6:30 Champagne Charlie Birthday Hash Hares: Champagne Charlie & Eat It Raw Start: Vienna Metro [orange line]
#603 August 3; 6:30 Trouser Snake & Mystery Hare, Start: Old Town, Alexandria VA

WE ARE ALWAYS LOOKING FOR HARES. If interested, contact GBOF at 703-876-4772.

COMING EVENTS

Wisconsin State Society's 16th Annual Orioles Game and MFC Birthday Tailgate Party - Saturday, June 20. Tailgate party at 3:00 pm, Orioles vs. Blue Jays game at 7:05 pm. $25 for game ticket and party. $20 extra for bus which leaves from Pentagon South Parking lot at 3:00 pm. See Mellow Foreskin Cheese or one of the other Cheeseheads for details.

Over-The Hump H3 750th Run - 26-28 June 1998, Location Lunga Point, Quantico, Va. Call PUDJAM0, Ext 10# or call Nun Knocker (Jeff Ward) 703- 492-8710 for details. Costs go up soon so call or phone to register.

WH4 600th Run Weekend - July 24 & 25. Friday, July 24 - Prelewd 6:00pm Happy Hour - Location TBA (Saturday) 3:00pm 600th Hash, social gathering to follow, activities will include beer, food, dancing, socializing, and overall a damn good time. Location of Hash and Part VFW in McLean (the Hash familiar joint near Great Falls).

Great Balls Of Fire & [just] Mike's Annual Lake And Pool Party - Saturday 1 August @ 6:00pm Location: Falls Church, VA - Jaguar Trail & Lakeside Village Drive [across from Falls Church H.S.]. Details are a comin'!

Tri-HASH-alon - 9 August Time TBD 200 yard float - beer/wine check, 5 mile Mountain Bike through a vineyard - beer/wine check, 2-3 mile run through the vineyard - beer/wine and food following... Where - Tarara Vineyard, Leesburg VA. Hares - *69 (Terry Robinson - terobins@cisco.com) Indecent Proposals (Stefanie Crisanto - scrisanto@fedsched.com

DC Red Dress Run - September 12, 1998, BIG Weekend Full Moon and Lots Of Fun. Plan For It NOW!

Octoberfest & Kuala Lumpur Extravaganza - September 24 - October 10 Drinks On Me Bud is putting together a 3 week package for 25+ hashers to attend the Octoberfest in Munich and other fun stuff before heading to the Interhash in Malaysia. See DOMB if you are interested. He has an AWSOME package for the whole thing!!

Interhash '98 - October 2-4; The Mother Hash, Kuala Lumpur H3, hosts; Join hashers from around the world for the 60th Anniversary of Hashing! Contact Rob Stott, +60-3-618-5650; or mail Jo Doraisamy, PO Box 40, Ampang PO, Ampang, Malaysia 68000. Registration is now $215 US (give or take a dollar for postage etc), to late for a cost reduction you last minute wankers.

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